Kenseth will unveil his retro Darlington scheme on Tuesday, but why not pay tribute to his fellow Wisconsinite? Marcis was a Cup Series title contender in the mid-1970s but by 1984 was on his way to becoming "The Last of the Independents." During one of NASCAR's longest careers, he ran a countless number of sponsors on the hood, including a whopping 35 between 1975-84.
If I'm being totally honest with you, this is just a shameless ploy to get Larson to wear that awesome Kyle Petty afro wig he had on with the Mello Yello car last year. Kyle Petty ran with the 7-Eleven colors in the mid-1980s. Maybe we can coax Diane Lane out to the track? Please? 5.
Plus, he can grow a full beard in like four days - so as to pay full tribute to Kenny Rogers. Plus, he owns a six pack of Cup titles, even using #SixPack as a hashtag during his chase for that sixth championship. Plus, he has also been known to drink an entire six pack.
But it's no secret that Johnson loves the 1982 movie "Six Pack." Plus, the fitness nut has an actual six pack. Yeah, yeah, I know Johnson has already unveiled his Darlington ride, a tribute to Dale Earnhardt's 1979 rookie of the year ride with Rod Osterlund. Their efforts won BP and his low-budget DeWitt Racing team the Winston Cup title over big-money headliner Cale Yarborough. It reminded me so much of the multiteam scramble to get Benny Parsons' destroyed ride back out onto the track at the 1972 season finale at Rockingham. Why this pairing? Because of the joint Front Row Motorsports/Roush Fenway Racing all-hands-on-deck repair efforts at Watkins Glen, all to get back out and snatch up only a few points toward making the Chase. But I have this picture in my mind of the prerace grid and photographers snapping shots of the Cougar Coal car surrounded by a dozen lascivious 40-something women holding chunks of coal in one hand and inappropriately squeezing 25-year-old DiBenedetto with the other. And OK, I don't even remember Ferrell Harris.
OK, I have zero recollection of the paint scheme that Ferrell Harris used on his Dodge back in 1975-80. OK, I know BK Racing runs No.83, but it will be the closest on the Darlington entry list to 82. Even if this car doesn't run the Southern 500, a team could still paint one up and then have Terry Bradshaw drive it into a motel swimming pool. If family card games aren't your thing, then we could go with Ellington's more famous sponsor: Hawaiian Tropic suntan lotions. 99 Uno car during the 1981 Warner Hogdon 400 at the Riverside International Raceway.
I mean, really, does it get more early 1980s than playing a game of UNO? No! So get this paint scheme off the "Discard" pile! Cup Series driver Tim Richmond drives the No. They were owned by Hoss Ellington and driven by the likes of Buddy Baker, Lake Speed, Tim Richmond and Kyle Petty. UNO-sponsored cars ran the gamut for General Motors, from Oldsmobiles to Buicks to Chevys. I'll be the dude dressed like Chris Economaki. You can thank me at the racetrack over Labor Day weekend. So, race teams, take notes and grab a bucket of paint. This year, because I'm a good guy, I'm doing it again. One year ago, I wrote a piece offering up some last-minute suggestions for any teams wanting to throw their old trucker hats into the oval, pointing out throwback paint schemes we wouldn't see at Darlington but I thought we should. The guys who inexplicably chose not to participate (I'm looking at you, Jeff Gordon) ended up feeling like that one dude who thought he was too cool to wear a tux to prom and wound up looking like the kitchen help. The best part of it all was the long line of throwback paint schemes being used by today's stars. This year's throwback theme focuses on the era of 1975-84, that crucible of a decade in time that dared to mix old-school vets including Richard Petty and David Pearson with brash youngsters such as Dale Earnhardt and Darrell Waltrip. I spent my two days off already dreaming of two days on that are still three weeks away from now: the Southern 500 and second annual Darlington Raceway Throwback weekend. (This is part where all of the Xfinity teams who are still draining the rainwater out of their roll cages are saying, "What off weekend, jerk?") Did everyone enjoy their NASCAR-off weekend? Yes? Great.